Interesting thought, the one minute thought experiment. I shall try this out for myself.

When is this one minute going to start?

Oh, just now. Okay, er. Hmm, Parasitology's great, hoping more in the same vein will be forthcoming. I wonder what Taryn's up to. Probably sleeping. Had to backspace twice here, made two typos. I like pie, but only if the crust isn't too thick.

And that's a minute. Hmm. Intriguing. Let's try this again.

The tawny frogmouth is a native Australian bird which camouflages itself as a stump. Which for some reason reminds me of cigarettes. It's just occurred to me that if I could type as fast as I could think I would have more thoughts down in this one minute space. What of the world oil crisis then?

Darn. Overshot by three seconds. Exactly as I said, if I had the ability to manifest my thoughts in words as quickly as they come, I wouldn't be curtailed by my deficient typing ability. Oh well, a third try.

Saw a plane today. No I didn't, that was yesterday. My rat's got some sort of respiratory problem, I don't know what it is. Gotta catch Kaela in the aquarium someday. Oh, and experiment was approved, it's always nice, crap I have to email Maxi.

This is ridiculous. It's somehow just not working for me. I'll try something different, I'll try and name as many friends as I can in one minute. Starting....now.

Aiman
Alissa
Azam
Gabriel
Fahad
Taryn
Kaela
Pete
Alex
Alex
Daphne
Lily
Nadiah
Jolivette
Mario
Chian Shen

Wow...I am DEFICIENT! This isn't so much train of thought as a cartwheeling carriage with five busted wheels. I give up. This experiment sods.

Well, actually...

Not quite.

I was up at Heron Island the past week, for a field course. The island is in the Capricorn-Bunker group at the southern end of the Great Barrier Reef, off the town of Gladstone [interesting fact: every stirring stick used in cafes in Australia and many other places was and is made in Gladstone, which also happens to be Australia's busiest port. Okay, that's two semi-interesting facts.]

The reason we were up there was because UQ has/had a research station on the island. I say had because a large swathe of it burned down last year in an accidental fire. Though no one was physically hurt the less said about that tragic incident the better. I don't have any photos of the research station, mostly because there was nothing to see, just a stack of improvised buildings and cabins. As you can see from the pictures the island was more interesting, though for the first three days the weather played havoc on us, with a 30-knot gale blowing through and weather greyer and wetter than knickers in a toilet bowl. Collecting fish for dissection in that weather was not a pleasant experience; hauling them back in a large bin full of water for a kilometre even less enjoyable. I duly caught a chill which degraded into a sneezing cold and dry cough, needless to say the knowledge that it could only have gone uphill from that point was highly motivating.

As you can see from the pics, the weather did eventually clear and the sun came out, which meant deviating from the labwork which until then I had been so passionately immersed in became highly tempting, and eventually, inevitable. But then who goes to the Great Barrier Reef and doesn't have a swim? Granted I wasn't like one of those mad dogs or Englishmen who pretty much swam regardless of weather conditions, but once the weather broke I wasn't about to pass up the opportunity, and I wasn't disappointed. The loggerhead turtle with carapace alone as long as I was tall was a well-deserved panacea for ten years of expectation, the eagle rays fairly swarmed, there were blacktip and whitetip reef sharks, stingrays the size of an American economic crisis and a giant grouper named Gus who apparently eats eagle rays whole, this wasn't so much kid in a candy store as a sugar-deprived sweet addict being dumped in a marshmallow making machine and left to die. If someone had offered me a magic potion which would have given me fins and the ability to live on that reef as some fish/human mutant forever I would have taken it with a grain of salt and a shot of tequila; as it is I'll settle for a post-doc research grant.

Given the paradisical feel about the place it was understandably hard for some people to associate the trip with any sort of actual work, and indeed this showed on some of the group. It does sometimes cheese me off that some people who evidently have little more than a passing interest in the course material bother to subject themselves to the torture of actually having to take it. 'Cheap trip to Heron' was probably the major factor here, but then these people evidently didn't reckon with the real reason why they were brought to the island in the first place. I won't single out anyone on this particular occasion, but it was definitely apparent some people were more dedicated to their work than others. I personally know I dutifully enjoyed the work component of this trip as much as the fun, and I'm grateful to the two coordinators, Tom Cribb and Rob Adlard, not to mention the tutors and station staff available, whose advice and supervision were indispensable throughout.

All in all it was a great and most importantly, productive, trip, one that I would undoubtably remember till my dying day.

I am now back in Brisbane and have started semester. Updates will definitely be fewer and further between than they have been in the last couple of months, what with work, research projects and perhaps even a casual job to juggle, but I have some to-do's on this site, most importantly the testimonial for Chian Shen which I have been working on, but not very whole-heartedly, I have to admit. Sorry Shen if you're reading this and wondering where that's gone.

Heron Island. Enough said.

As you, the reader may have already seen from my previous post, I treasure my friendships. To be more specific, I treasure good quality friends, the ones with whom you strike up a bond that lasts just about forever, with great depth of interaction and adds something to both parties’ lives, and ones you’ll definitely remember to the end of days. I rate friendships [much as it’s perhaps ethically debatable to rate friendships, but let’s for writing’s sake] on several criteria, feasibility being first and foremost, followed by longevity and effort. If a friendship can last an age and a score, there has to be something about it that allows the relationship to be maintained, thus feasibility is the highest of priorities. A good friend is someone whom, to me, I can get along with in any weather. Moreover, that friend adds value to my life, through the depth of our interaction. While it is true that friendships come and go, there will always be a few which I will always make an effort to preserve and maintain, by virtue of their depth.

That little segue completed, provides a fitting lead-up to this next discourse on Aiman Azri. As far as friends go, Aiman’s up there with the closest of them. One of only two friends with whom I maintain a close and near-constant interaction with from high school, he has been a friend for the past eight years, though we really only became close in the last couple of years of high school. Aiman provides an excellent example of how a friendship can last by virtue of connection. I always thought he was an enigmatic sort of person, one whose interests evidently seemed focused away from high school matters, but then that’s Aiman, a very out-of-the-box sort of person.

One of the first things that caught my eye was his English prowess. You could be forgiven for looking at Aiman and thinking he was nothing more than your conventional game-fanboy Malay guy, until he opens his mouth. Anyone who knows Aiman would know of his acerbic spin on things, good when you wish to have a good laugh, bad if you wish to cross lances with him. A very well-read person, he relishes opportunities to further widen his prowess and utilise it, which makes him adept at amongst other things, Scrabble and public-speaking. Indeed Aiman was a school rep for both. Already aware of his gift of the gab, I got to see it in action at the ISKL SEA forensics tournament back in 2004, in which we both participated. It was also great fun [and painful] battling it out with him over Scrabble, which we still do today. Being a school rep he was always a tough cookie, and is still a killer player to this day. It is perhaps fitting at this point that I insert a sportsman’s salute for many a fine battle waged. The 500-point thrashings he used to dole out were the motivation which spurred me to develop my own game, and it is perhaps my greatest tribute to him that I now can almost match his game.

In a big way, connecting on these levels helped establish a firmer friendship between us than I have been able to with most people. Along the way we found we could associate on and share just about anything, making him valuable company all these years, that even when I’m in Australia I ensure I maintain regular connection with him. Not many friends can be said to have changed me, but Aiman is one of those rare few. Knowing him inspired my own confidence in a big way, providing me the impetus to opening up and being more self-expressive. As has already been stated, his consummate talent at Scrabble spurred on my own development, and he has been able to encourage me not to take a sweepingly generalist view on things such as gaming. In a slightly more emulatory vein, I could perhaps claim that my own occasionally acerbic views are partly due to my exposure to Aiman’s own firebrand humour, and there isn’t a moment where we’re together that isn’t enjoyable. I am happy to have a friend with whom I can connect on so many levels with, and truly appreciate his company.

Aiman is Alissa’s boyfriend. To view his blog, visit http://mistcakes.blogspot.com

With less than a week to go before return to Australia, I will reflect upon a holiday somewhat distasteful in several ways, but also cherishable in others. I also realise that for the most part I have not mentioned any of my friends in any detail since having started this blog. Hence I have decided to eulogise the three friends I have remaining in Malaysia with whom I share bonds remarkable in their depth and longevity. First though, the holiday. All in all it’s been relaxing enough, but there have been many instances where incidents have soured my stay here. This has entirely to do with the uneasy relationship I have with my parents, and particularly my mother.

As a staunchly religious family, my parents are all-action Buddhists of the Nichiren sect. Considering my own epiphanies regarding humanity and religion, my laxed attitude towards the faith I ostensibly belong to has caused much consternation amongst them. I will probably rant at length about that later. The other thing that my parents struggle to come to terms with is my own expressiveness. I find this a little odd, as I know for a fact that I have never been the most yes-sir-no-sir type of person, though I will admit I have indeed become much more vocal through the course of my residence in Australia. Whether this is an effect of living in a much more encouraging culture, or part of the natural process of growing up, or both, I can’t be too sure, but one thing is certain, it is certainly no booster for a healthily happy family relationship, particularly when you have parents who seem to take any sign of dissent as a gross affront to their authority. All this has made for some highly fractious encounters between us, and I cannot lie when I say I am relieved to be headed back none too soon. Don’t get me wrong, considering the depth of my relationship with my family these are pretty minor infractions, and they certainly do not affect my judgement of them.

All in all it’s been pretty stressful for a holiday, and it is at a time like this that I have grown to appreciate the few friends whom I can seek solace in, whether as a shoulder to cry on or as a means to counter some of the dismal feeling by enjoying the privilege of their company. Being who I am, I don’t have many friends. I am not one of those people who go around collecting as many companions as possible; I am content maintaining a few close friendships with people whom I can associate with on a deeper basis. In Malaysia I have really only maintained such a relationship with two, recently three, people. It is here that I choose to eulogise the first of those people, Alissa Roslan. I don’t often write eulogies. Eulogies are usually reserved for dead or special people; this is a special person.

Alissa came into my life in late November last year. She’s Aiman’s girlfriend, and we were introduced whilst I was still in Australia, over MSN. Considering how conservative I am with regards to meeting new people, it’s a little amazing how well we hit it off, especially since our first face-to-face meeting was still nearly a month away. Nevertheless, the friendship struck up, and though I learned little, I managed to glean a few ideas as to her character and her history.

Alissa met Aiman at some inter-college sports function back in [one of the two of you correct me if you’re reading this and find it erroneous] July, and despite an initial rocky start to their relationship, hit it off really well and officially became ‘an item’ just a short while before I was myself introduced to her. Right from the off she struck me as a very fun-loving character [really, who doesn’t want a bit of fun in their lives, but this was different somehow], if a little shy and soft-spoken. Without going into details, suffice to say her family has certain previous, though nothing altogether unconventional [I am unwilling to flesh this out, don’t bother asking]. Whether this has shaped her into what she is today, I won’t theorise on that either, but what’s certain is she comes across as one of the sweetest and most unpretentious people I’ve been privileged to meet.

All this from just a smattering of MSN chats, it would be a grievous deceit if I said I wasn’t anticipating our first meeting when I returned to KL for my summer holidays. She and Aiman came to pick me up from the train station. I can only assume I left a hell of a first impression as they drove down the avenue to the arrivals gate, what with me in my green suit, blue leopard-patterned shirt and long hair tied back with a rainbow scarf, not to mention one of the first conversations Aiman and I struck up being about putting rocket engines on roti canai [yes we are that random, pretty often], but all my positive assumptions about Alissa were duly confirmed, and as time passed, our friendship developed. In addition to her cheery disposition, we shared common ground in several interests, most notably classical music, piano [she’s a Grade 8 grad] and clothes shopping [well, sort of. Doing it with her is fun though]. Though we both like reading, her preferred genres differ stupendously from my own, but we still share a common appreciation for each other’s differences in that aspect. Essentially she turned out to be very cultured and though perhaps a little low on self-confidence has no doubts about carrying her own dignity forward.

We often hung out together, if not with Aiman, as was usually the case, then it was my privilege to share her company alone. Our time would often be consumed slowly perusing the shopping malls, talking about life and engaging in stupid banter, which taken altogether, was really plain fun. [It might perhaps be important to herewith address concerns some readers may have that I have perhaps been muscling in on my friend’s relationship or attempting to do so; let it be known this is as far from the truth as it’s possible to go. We all know our responsibilities towards each other as friends, and I certainly wouldn’t want to jeopardise my friendship with Aiman, whom I will admit is the closest friend I have from high school, together with Chian Shen. I will make it a point to detail my relationship with these two at some later point.]

This entry was written on the same day we hung out together, alone, for pretty much the whole morning and afternoon. Why I write this is because my meeting Alissa has been one of the most special things to have happened in a while for me, purely for the way we get along as friends. Now, and for the first time in a long long while, I have one more person to look forward to returning to. It’s just as well that she is in a relationship with arguably my closest friend right now. Random readers who don’t know me would obviously not know that I really have only two friends to return to whenever I come home, three if you now count Alissa. The rest of them are either intermittent passings in the street, or absent altogether. These three friends, for me, represent all that is right about friendships. The reason I have so few is because these were the only full friendships that I could carry forward with full sincerity, without pretensions, facetiousness or awkwardness. When one has so little, he learns to appreciate what he has got even more; with regards to friends, I am one who dwells in abject poverty. I cherish the ones I get, and now with my newest friend, my time back in Malaysia, which at times is frankly closer Hell than Heaven, has been made all the more precious and memorable.

Shameless plug: Alissa’s blog can be read here: http://alaistar.blogspot.com

I’ve copped a lot of flak in my time, from many angles. Many have brought into consideration my apparent sense of controversy, i.e the way I seemingly look for or create my own causes for debate, which when comes to fruition, I will make clear my stance in as eloquently insulting and pernicious language as can be found. I guess one could say I argue a lot. The facts are clear: I see a clear counterpoint where people see perfection, and I have a big lexicon to dig into. It’s sort of like when Grandma insists on pulling out a whole sheaf of photo albums to embarrass your parents with whenever your family drops by: a big arsenal, and potentially humiliating for the target if utilised. Today I intend to utilise this potent weapon and will aim it a rather familiar and oft-referred to target: the Malaysian establishment.

First of February. Happy pointless stupid public holiday. Specifically it’s Federal Territory Day, an annual public holiday in all the federal territories in Malaysia [we have three, for some goddamned reason] , and the third midweek or weekday holiday in three weeks, soon to be followed by a fourth. There was Awal Muharam two weeks previously, a worldwide celebration marking the Prophet Muhammad’s birthday. Fair enough, I guess, even despite my aspiritual predilections I still have utmost respect for people who wish to celebrate religious holidays. Still, you could see the first signs that the government would ensure it stays well among the leader’s pack in the international foot shooting competition by declaring Thaipusam a national holiday. Until now, the Hindu celebration of the gods was a limited affair, with public holidays only declared in a few states; Kuala Lumpur remained unconcerned by the event. Political cynics [this demographic comprises most Malaysians lucid enough to perceive something is deeply rotten in this country] will [ELECTIONS] have [ELECTIONS] their [ELECTIONS] own [ELECTIONS] varying [ELECTIONS] theories [ELECTIONS] as [ELECTIONS] to [ELECTIONS] why [INDIAN RACIAL PROBLEMS] the [ELECTIONS] current [ELECTIONS] establishment [ELECTIONS] would [ELECTIONS] suddenly [ELECTIONS] choose [ELECTIONS] to [ELECTIONS] declare [ELECTIONS] this [NEED I GO ON?] a [REALLY?] nationwide [YOU SERIOUSLY NOT GETTING THIS?] public [FINE, OKAY] holiday [ELECTIONS YOU FUCKING CRETIN].

In lieu of current circumstances there’s more favour being curried than the biggest nasi kandar cookout competition [certified Malaysian Book of Records, naturally], so in a sense the declaration of Thaipusam as a public holiday surprised no one and is actually somewhat understandable. Hey, after all, it is a hefty 8% of the population who actually make it meaningful. It is, however, a lot more inexplicable why when considering the aforementioned circumstances, the government still chooses to persist with as meaningless and impractical a holiday as Federal Territory Day. With Chinese New Year around the corner, this would mean four weeks would have passed consecutively with a weekday being allocated for a national vacation. When you consider that two of these are essentially pointless tomfoolery, it’s a wonder we haven’t yet lobbied the International Olympic Committee to make holidaying an official sport. We would after all win hands down. No other country I know has nearly as many public holidays as Malaysia. Every race and majority religion is afforded at least one holiday celebrated either nationwide or by one or several states: Id, Awal Muharam, Chinese New Year, Diwali, Thaipusam, Wesak Day, Christmas, Aidiladha, Ka’amatan, Gawai, not to mention Independence Day, New Year’s, the king’s birthday, and every sultan’s birthday which thankfully is only celebrated by the relevant state.

For the sake of racial togetherness and commune, perhaps allowing most of these holidays to stand is a good thing, but then what’s the deal then with something fucking pointless like Federal Territory Day? The holiday was founded with the intention of fostering appreciation of the country’s capital city and the roles it plays in the manipula…running of the country. A noble thought, perhaps, but then seriously, who gives a flying fuck, especially when there’s so many other more valid holidays to celebrate? The fact is we have frankly too many holidays. It’s a wonder we haven’t cottoned onto Easter and Armistice Day, and frankly Fed Territory Day is stupidly redundant and redundantly stupid. It might perhaps have worked if we didn’t have three of them. Celebrating the beauty and la-de-la of one capital city might actually be fine, but with three, no one could reasonably be expected to take this celebration seriously. In fact, Fed Territory day itself long ago ceased to be an actual celebration. Gone are the spectacular propaganda-style parades through the city centre [in fact I can’t even recall us ever having those for this holiday], there have been no initiatives taken by any branch of administration to rekindle some form of actual celebration, and the only hint of ecstasy faintly emanates from small localised parades held away from the city and the minds of most rightfully-occupied Malaysians. So low-key were the ‘celebrations’ I had no idea they even happened until a week afterward.

The only thing Federal Territory Day was good for was the fact it gave our family an opportunity to spring clean the house in anticipation of CNY, and I’m sure most other people living in the affected areas had their minds occupied by such things as concerns over the impact another fucking useless and irritating weekday public holiday would have on government expenditure and national wealth, or ironing out that important international business deal which would have had to be postponed because guess what? The Malaysian’s on holiday. No one I know takes Federal Territory Day seriously, so much so it isn’t even celebrated properly anymore. The fact that the current establishment persist in believing it is still practical to maintain a useless holiday such as this together with the 2,408 other holidays, and insist on doing so, shows what kind of facetious un-foresighted gits they are. Perhaps no one in a position of authority would ever read this rant [and given the dissenting tone of it and several other articles here, it’s probably just as well] but if they do, here’s me unabashedly speaking on behalf of the rest of the Malaysian people: Federal Territory is a fucking useless holiday, GET RID OF IT!